Lord Have Mercy, the “Whalez Bruh” Are Back!
“Whalez, Bruh” that annoying craft beer phrase that makes me cringe every time I hear it. I’ve joked that the next time I hear it I just may take a hostage, but I’m not sure if I’m joking anymore.
As much as I’d love to blame millennials and hipsters, as I’m relatively certain that it was a hipster that coined the phrase, I’ve heard folks my age(50’s) utter this nonsense.
Used to describe a hard to find and/or special release beer, typically pricey and usually high in abv and overused by the pretentious, anyone not full of themselves would never say anything so ridiculous.
These cockroach like creatures usually skulk in pairs or packs, huddling at the end of the bar, pretentiously making fun of non craft beer drinkers and anyone they don’t deem as socially relevant as they are.
Fear not my friends, though they are obnoxious and convinced of their own superiority, they are relatively harmless as they are more afraid of you than you are of them.
But, be vigilant, the sole purpose of their existence is to make your drinking experience a miserable one, so you’ll be as miserable as they are on the inside.
Don’t Fear The Beer!
Yes friends, don’t let these pathetic creatures stop you from enjoying a special beer any way that you like. They’ll insult your glassware, the way you drink, heck maybe even the way you ordered the beer. Fire back if you like, wit isn’t typically their strong suit, but it’s best to just ignore their ignorance as it’s attention that they crave.
Beer, even craft beer was meant to be accessible, ALL CRAFT BEER, so don’t let these chucklenuts convince you otherwise.
As summer turns to fall, they’ll become more brazen and crawl out from the rocks they’ve been hiding under. So don’t be afraid to go out to your favorite pub, taproom or beer store, but beware, they’ll be skulking around every corner just looking for happy beer drinkers to make miserable.
Just remember, they have no power unless you give it to them. So … choose your brew and order with confidence, raise your glass, smile and nod at the “Bruh’s” at the end of the bar with a self assurance sure to make them cower and mutter to themselves.
I Am The Beer Whisperer
Beervangelist, Prolific Beer Drinker
Purveyor of Wisdom and …
All Around Good Guy!
*No Bruh’s were hurt in the writing of this article
Life is serious, beer shouldn’t be!